100 posts and still grossing you out...

Yesterday was a BEAUTIFUL Saturday morning! Somehow or another I managed to get showered, get the kids dressed and my house clean by 10:30 am! I had the bug. If you live in a small town you know what I mean by that, and I had to get out of town. Dave was in the Sand Dunes riding. Why not take off for the day? I packed some pyjamas for the kids and headed through the Canyon. I was blissfully ignorant of what lied ahead!

I should have paid attention to the first indication that this day was going to bite...no radio! Dave had done some repairs to the car and the fancy anti-theft radio had not been "reset". I could live with that, I guess. The sunshine made up for it and I passed the time by listening to "Handy Manny" talk about being green. We made it through the Canyon and had a nice lunch with my parents and Grandma Great at a little Cafe in Mapleton, visited Uncle Richard to check out his latest home project, played with Rufus the dog and stopped at my Mom's for a couple of hours. I even got a chance to sneak away for a quick errand. My sister-in-law, Lynette, was nice enough to bring her daughter, Kyla, and join us for a movie in Spanish Fork. The plan was to leave straight from the movie and make it back to Price in time to hear about Dave's trip and tuck the kids in bed. This was where best laid plans went horribly wrong.

Fifteen minutes or so into the movie, Saren threw up. It was just a little urp really, dripping onto her dress and my lap. I wiped it up as best as I could and felt a little bad for stinking like baby puke but kept enjoying the movie. Thirty minutes later, unfortunately, Saren hurled again. This second one was no "urp", it seemed like, at least, four gallons of barf. My poor baby had a thick, continuous rope of vomit that kept pouring out of her and wouldn't stop. Her dress was completely soaked as were most of my jeans and one shoe where the puke had run down my leg and filled up my ballet flat. Really! I had a blanket to soak up what I could, but the floor was so slippery underneath us I barely made it out of the row to exit the theatre. It didn't take me too long in the restroom to realize our clothes could not be salvaged. I got most of the chunks off us, and walked a few stores away to a Kmart, where Saren and I roamed the store, smelling like homeless people and looking for something cheap we could change into. After making our purchases, we went to the Kmart Restroom armed with a new box of wet wipes to change. I danced around the handicapped stall, barefooted, trying to wipe vomit off my thighs and put on some new jeans while trying to keep Saren away from the toilet. It was fun!

We made it back to the movie just as Lynette was leaving with her daughter and my boys. However, we didn't even make it back to Aunt Lynette's house before my poor baby destroyed her new outfit and her car seat with another bout. How she had anything left in her I will never understand. A bath and some clean jammies later, I was getting Eddie and Jacob to load into the car when I heard a whimpering from the bathroom. Eddie had been sick with diarrhea and tried to take care of it himself. Wow!...is all I can say about that. I scrubbed the bathroom, scrubbed Eddie, threw him into the tub, got his jammies out of the car and finally got on the road. I said out load..."Holy crap! Who is next?" and Eddie answered, "How 'bout Jacob?". Meanwhile Dave was calling...Are you still in Utah County? What is taking so long?

I had to stop for gas, and was so flustered that I drove away from the pump with it still attached to my car. Arrrgghhh! And I make so much fun of morons who do that! Finally I got on my way towards the freeway and Saren hurled again! It was merciless! I pulled over and mopped up what I could with the last clean thing in the car (Jacob's pyjamas that he hadn't changed into). When he looked over and saw me using them he said..."Hey! H E Y!". I couldn't blame him. Thankfully, Saren finally fell asleep in her soaked clothes and car seat and slept the rest of the way home. She didn't even puke again until I carried her into our house from the car. The last 7 miles from Helper to Price were especially nerve wracking as Eddie had announced his yummy felt yucky and he needed to go poop again. Somehow, we were spared that disaster.

So I am not at church today! Instead, I am home with my poor little sick ones. I was going to spend today thinking of something clever to write about for my 100th post, but it seems I have been led in a very specific direction. Really, how could I ignore a day like yesterday?