called to serve...

Our not-so-little nephew, Kyle, who has been living with us for the past year or so....is going on a mission. His call came in the mail yesterday, and it was so exciting!

He waited all day, without opening it, for his family to be with him.

He is off too....drum roll please...

The Germany Berlin Mission!

Wow!

He was sure he was going state side because of the lower postage on the envelope. Ha!

I've never seen Steve so nervous...

Proud parents...

Calling Grandma and Grandpa...

We love him like the caucasian son who looks like Dave we never had. Our kids are going to miss him so much! He is such a good, big cousin to them. Jacob had guessed Kyle was headed to Japan and Eddie said..."how bout the wave pool?". They were both wrong. We are definitely proud of him...he will be a great missionary. Congratulations Kyle!

in loving memory...

I couldn't let anymore time pass without a post in memory of my amazing Grandmother, Zelma (yes Zelma) Ann Lewis Pendleton. I love this lady! She died at the tender age of 97, and left her unmistakable impression on the world, and on me. I loved her BRUTAL honesty, her smiles, her raised eyebrows and her praise. As a child, she had a way of making me feel like the most beautiful, sweet, wonderful girl in the world. And as an adult, she assured me that I was the best Mom she had ever seen, and when she said it...I could believe it! At least for a minute or two. I don't know how so much love and concern could exist in one person, for so many people, but with Grandma, it did. Everything she ever did, said or wrote (she was known to write a scolding letter or two) was motivated by a HUGE love for her family. She was unconditionally loyal and unapologetic in her belief in those she loved. She knew what we are all capable of, and she expected everyone she loved to live up to that potential. She was a true matriarch to so many.

Grandma loved being alive. She looked for beauty all her life...and was never complacent or ungrateful when she found it. She found joy in people, in the outdoors, in cooking, in friends, in music, in sports, in laughing, in traveling, in her husband, in serving her family and in so many small things. She really cherished her life and lived it to the fullest. What a lesson she taught me through the way she approached her life.

Grandma loved to fish. She had a current fishing license that will expire months after she did. That is so typical of her, being ready to die...but not about to sit around and wait for it!

Grandma was a beautiful, graceful lady who carried herself with elegance and with pride. She was always groomed immaculately, standing with perfect posture, and a presence that couldn't be discounted but was still welcoming and kind. She expected strangers to prove themselves to her, and once they did...she was their fiercest friend. I admire her strength. She never changed, not for anyone. She was genuine and unabashed about who she was and what she believed. I always knew how much she loved me.

My two, sweet Grandma's knew each other as young girls. They used to walk home from school together in Kindergarten and loved each other. Somehow they ended up back in the same small town, later in their life, as young mothers. Somehow what started out as joking "What if my Lynda dated your son"...and so on and so on turned into my parents getting married. Somehow, they remained friends with shared grandchildren. And somehow, they both lost their husbands, later in life and remained close to one another. Somehow, they ended up with the same hospice nurse, who would pass messages between the two of them...like school mates again. And somehow, they died within several weeks of one another, both with huge reunions waiting for them on the other side. How I was so blessed to have the heritage I have, I will never understand. But, I find myself increasingly thankful for these women and how their lives have formed mine. It is truly humbling to think of these beautiful ladies. I love you Grandma P!

hoping this has arrived in Afghanistan...

Love you Merrilyn....miss you!

why I don't watch commercials...

Today Eddie saw a commercial for this... and said "Oh wow! I need to get one of those so I can get bigger! You wanna get bigger Mom?". Not like that.

thoughts on being a mommy

Tonight, I lied in bed...listening to the sound of tiny bubbles burst in a sippy cup as my baby girl drank her last bit of milk for the day. I watched her tiny chest rise and fall, and felt her mean, scratchy fingernails wriggle around my arm as she calmed herself. I smelled her baby lotion and her freshly shampooed hair. I felt her warm exhale on my cheek as she huddled in close. I listened as her tiny, sweet voice mumbled herself off to sleep. I stared at her tight, rosy cheeks and those long black lashes. I drank it in and sighed. One day, I will blink, and she will be grown.

What am I going to do when I don't have her on my hip as I walk around home, trying to get things done with one hand? When Eddie doesn't need my reassuring hugs, or try to rub noses with me? When I don't hear his squeaky whines and whimpers and sighs throughout the house? When I can't tickle Jacob awake every morning, and watch that always present grin creep onto his face for another day? When I can't welcome him home from school with a big hug, and feel our whole home brighten with his return?

This is it. This, right now...is the best part of life. This is my life's greatest honor and reward.

Someday my house will stay clean, I won't make 7 meals a day. There will be no fingerprints on my cupboards and doors. The books will stay in the bookshelf. The toilet paper will stay on the roll. I'll sleep through the night without interruption, I'll read books in quiet solitude. I'll answer the phone and have a nice conversation. I'll make plans to run errands and maybe see a movie. I'll pay the bills and file things neatly away. I'll listen to music I like, or watch a TV show for me. And I will MISS this...more than anything. I'll wish for THIS back, more than anything. And I'll long for the sound of their cries and giggles, the messy evidence of their existence and the bountiful, overwhelming chaos that is my life today.