no thank you

What is the deal lately with all these washed up and/or retired sort-of famous people hosting vacations? Do I really want to be relaxing on the deck of a cruise ship in by bathing suit and open my eyes to see Dick Nourse strolling towards me? No, I do not!

I just got an e-mail advertisement for the Lavell Edwards Paris and the heart of Normandy Tour. What? Should this former BYU head football coach with a propensity for frowning make me think of vacationing in the French countryside? Is it because the French are also grumpy...is that the connection? I think it is a little bit of a stretch. When I have pictured myself strolling along the Champs Elysees, touring the Louve, and eating at some amazing French patisserie I was never accompanied by a tall, older stranger who wore a headset and yelled a lot.

It seems the good people from the travel industry could at least make some hosting assignments that make sense. Some suggestions I have...

David Hasselhoff''s tour of Southern California's trashiest beaches.
Omarosa presents, Transylvania.
Eminem and the streets of Detroit (west side of the track tour).
Charlene Wells hosts a tour of historic downtown Salt Lake City and the Golden Spike Monument.
Richard Simmons presents "Jazzin' on a trolley car! An interactive, sweat burning tour of San Fransisco".
Dolly Parton's - The air is filled with gold dust tour of the Appalachians (don't read too closely...there is no boob joke here - OK maybe a little one).
Enrique Iglesias hosts the "Everything is sexier in Latin America" tour.

Chuck Norris - well, let's face it. Where wouldn't you go with Chuck Norris. If you are unaware of how cool Chick Norris is, check out this website. http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/